4

My Precious Lydia,

You're 4!  You are so excited to be 4!  You have been asking for months if you're 4 yet, or "am I still 'free'?"  It has been so much fun to see your excitement.

Every time I asked you what would be fun to receive as a present, you had different ideas (Elsa and Anna dolls, My Little Ponies, dress up dresses, running shoes with yellow like Hannah and Abby's).  The one idea that stuck every time...the one most important to you:  sour gummy worms!  You are such a crazy girl!  You wanted purple and blue cupcakes, so we made an Elsa dress out of cupcakes.

What have you been up to this year?  So much!  You are still my busy girl...loving to dress up, climbing and jumping off of everything, doing your gymnastics, exercising to my workout videos, fighting off pretend bad guys (you've been introduced to the Incredibles...you're still asking for a mask and a super hero suit), pretending to hunt, and serving up tea parties.  You are very excited to play on Stevie's soccer team this summer too.

A couple of months ago, you became a big sister!  You love Adelyn so much....and you keep talking about your next sister already.  You even helped in our decision to name Addie.  You knew she was a girl throughout most of my pregnancy.  It is so fun to you when it's just girl time....us 3 girls.  You help me get her bath ready.  You pick out clothes for her to wear.  You bring me diapers and wipes.  You love to give her hugs and kisses ..and make her smile.  According to you, she's been smiling at you from the womb.  You've been teaching her exercise and gymnastics moves.  You also asked me to join you the day after we got home from the hospital.  Holding her is pretty special too.  The first week, you would hold onto the handle of her carseat in the car...to make sure she wouldn't fall over.  Such a loving, protective sister...for the most part...but when she cried, you just covered her carseat with the blanket cover because "you don't like that sound."  We've worked on that since. :) Your Grandma H. got you a baby doll and baby doll bath for when she was born, so you could take care of a baby too.  You weren't so interested...you've got the real thing!  You made the doll tub into a sled and rode down the opened recliner from the top to the bottom to the floor....backwards.  Scared this mom to death.  Still not sure how you squeezed into that thing!  You can turn anything into fun...and anything into something a little dangerous!

Your favorite movies are Frozen, the Air Bud movies, Cinderella, Mary Poppins, and The Sound of Music.  When you got your "barilla" you asked if it would make you fly like Mary Poppins.  We saw the Sound of Music this spring at a high school.  This was one of my favorite memories with you!!  You were mesmerized by the whole thing.  The music, the acting, the lights, the scenery.  You sang along, and a man in the audience (who saw you on one of your bathroom exits), thought you should've been Gretl.  When it was over, you joyfully clapped and shouted, "Bye Maria!  Bye!  See you later!"  At home, you asked if you could go to Maria's house.  Maybe some day you'll be on stage.  Maybe some day, you'll be a Maria!  If not, that's ok too.  It was so special to share those moments with you, and I hope we're able to enjoy more musicals together down the road.

You've been really into making crafts and projects ...whatever you think of in the moment: waterpark slides, roller coasters, a hot pink holster for Daddy, bows and arrows, paintings, and stickers galore everywhere.  You now have a craft/project bin to keep your supplies and art work.

Your beloved bunny has been on vacation the last couple weeks.  We're not sure when she's returning.  Yes, she's lost.  You've handled it well.  You still make your brother laugh with your bunny "voice" even in her absence...making up wildly silly stories.  You always have something to say...an answer for everything.  You ordered steak at the restaurant.

You are full of confidence and joy.  It's contagious!  I hope you hold onto that through your 98th birthday!  I bet you'll still be jumping off furniture...even though you'll hear my voice in your head.  You love hard, you play hard...you just do everything to maximum capacity, haha.  You exude what Christ came for...to give us life...life to the full!  I have no doubts that you'll make a difference in others' lives as you grow!  You have already added so much joy, fun, and love in mine!  I love you so much!!  Enjoy #4 to the fullest!

Love always and with a kiss,
Mom

She's Here!

She's Here!  1 week old.  Adelyn Grace!  We are still shocked she's a she!  She had us fooled! :)  But, she's super beautiful.  The day after she was born, all I could think of was the troll lady in Frozen (yes, that's about all that is ever playing in our house).  "Cutie(s), I'm gonna keep you!"

For my own sake, and maybe for your curiosity, I'm going to record her birth story here.

Because of big brother's size at birth and my very difficult recovery that led to surgery, etc., we had been keeping an eye on this baby's size.  When I hadn't gone into labor on my own by 39 weeks, we broached the induction discussion.  I really hoped I would go into labor naturally.  However, I really didn't want to deliver a 9lb or greater baby either.  We scheduled my induction for 39 weeks 5 days.  Weird and craziness began.  As I left my 39 week appointment, I realized the day I was scheduled was not on my doctor's schedule.  Maybe the doctors had switched?  Either way, I felt like I was ready as I'll ever be.  Maybe I should've waited for the next day with my doctor (who I love), but it is what it is, and she is here...and she is beautiful.

I tried pretty much everything to go into labor on my own for a couple weeks...and all I did was wear myself out.  Not great to go into an induction with sore muscles.  Don't try that.  I couldn't sleep the night before.  I was excited, and I was nervous.  I'd never been induced before.  There was that.  As wonderful as my other labors were, I had real fears.  There was that.  I had other fears and emotions in play this being our baby after a miscarriage.  There was that.  I wanted to know if this baby was a boy or a girl.  There was that.  And, I was still mulling over our girl names...a bit stressing to me not having had it ready.  There was that.

The morning of, I received my call saying they had a room ready for me.  Then she gave me the blowing news that no visitors under 14 were allowed due to the crazy flu going around.  I get there are reasons for this.  But poof.  My dreams of my babies coming to see the littlest baby shortly after birth were dashed.  Not a really big deal in the grand scheme of things, but when you never leave your kids overnight anyway...and they were SO excited about this baby....we had talked about them coming to visit, etc.  Now we were going to have to wait 2 days before they even saw their sister.  Anyway, I cried after I hung up the phone and got ready to go.  We woke the kids up.  Grandma and Grandpa were here to take care of them.  Lydia gave me a big hug goodbye.  Stevie patted my belly one last time saying goodbye to the baby.  It was the sweetest.

We got to the hospital around 8am.  I got into my hospital gown and laughed.  I had seen an episode of One Born Every Minute, and the expecting mom had put her gown on backwards.  That's all I could think about.  I guess the laughter was a little stress relief...had no idea how much I would need.  We met the doctor who was really on call that day (yeah, not mine...but we decided to just go with it), and there were concerns about no documentation about my placenta previa they had found at 20 weeks...and I was not told about.  I said, I hadn't found out till my 36 week ultrasound, and they checked on it then, and said everything was good.  It took awhile, and that was confirmed.  I didn't really need that extra uncertainty tossed into the mix of my ever swirling emotions.  Was I going to end up with a c-section?  Craziness.  Enough with the curve balls.

IV time.  The nurse said she was the best in the unit.  I had awesome veins.  Awesome veins to blow apparently.  2 sticks and I have the ugliest bruises on the front and back of my arms to prove it.  Next nurse came in and was able to insert the catheter, but they couldn't use it for the blood tests...so that would be additional sticks.  I'm starting to lose my confidence in this whole process.  Around 10am, at my request, we started with breaking my water before jumping to pitocin.  She was able to, but no fluid came out.  So, we started the pitocin.  They only had to bump it up twice before my body took over.  It honestly was going so smoothly at this point.  I was encouraged my body kicked into gear, and don't you know, my waters were finally starting to gush. No pretty way to say that.  So, gush it is.  While I was in labor, I had a million visitors...yup, a million.  Some lady asking to test me for herpes??  While I'm in labor, contracting, you're asking me for some kind of sample for herpes?  What even in the world?!  No!  I don't have it!  Get out!  Other people...I can't even tell you.  And a million students, residents...you name it, they were there.  I began to get angry all these people could be there, and I couldn't see my kids later!

Matt is going to school full time right now and is nearing the end....halleluia!  But, he had this big research paper thing he was working on due that night. Guess what he was doing while I labored?  By the early afternoon, I had started to stall out briefly.  They were quick to bump me up....and bump me up again with the pitocin.  Before this, I was chatting online with family, and we were busy watching 19 Kids and Counting, The Middle, and Reba.  At this point, the tv was off, I was blowing hard through contractions, bouncing on that ridiculous ball.  Matt had dropped his schoolwork, and was now furiously rubbing my aching back.  3:00 rolled by.  No thank you to the nurse who had guessed me to be having the baby at 3.  The clocked ticked on, and I was hurting...hurting very badly.  I couldn't stay calm.  I was shaking.  As out of control as my body felt, I knew, this is good.  This means I'm near the end.  The baby is coming.  This is totally transition.  The doctor came in and wanted to check me.  She finished up and sat next to me on the bed.  She told me I was 4cm 100%.  Pop. the. balloon.  4cm!!  She told me I had just started active labor.  Active labor!!  Not the best move.  She should've told me nothing, haha.  I cried.  I couldn't do this any more if I was only 4cm.  Bring me that epidural.  Stick a fork in me.  I'm done.  I was so spent.  I can't even describe it.  I told Matt I was tired of trying to be strong.  I was so tired.  So much pain.  A lot of fear.  2 natural deliveries were enough for me.  I couldn't do this anymore.  I cried.  Yup, broke the rules.  I also begged them to turn down the pitocin.  They actually did bump it down once.  The resident came in to tell me the epidural would not take away the stretching and burning pain (the biggest fear I had this time after previous deliveries and tearing).  Thanks for not being completely honest with a woman.  She wanted to check me one more time before honoring my pain relief request.  I was complete.  In less than 20 minutes, my 4cm was now 10.  So, forget the epidural, we're just going to get this baby out.  With the 100 nurses, doctors, residents, and nursing students by my side, I was at the mercy of one particular resident.  She had me push in a ball.  That was different.  I felt like an armadillo.  Bed down, I was supposed to curl my body in pulling my legs up.  Not the best position....and ended up with a bruised tailbone.  I should've argued it.  But, I hurt, and I just wanted the baby out.  About a half hour of armadillo curls and my baby came....and came....and came.  5:06pm.  I screamed, a lot.  Grunts turned to yells because the burning didn't stop.  Probably because I was pushing her out up hill...she didn't just slide out once her head and shoulders were out.  Poor baby.  I was definitely the most vocal with her out of the 3 deliveries. And this is the one Matt got on tape, hahahaha.  Oh well.  It is what it is.  Matt and I had an agreement to give me a moment after delivery before sharing, "It's a..."  I wanted to be able to hear it...and understand it, haha.  He was amazing to be by my side (saying he was so ready to punch someone...anyone...over my pain...he was seriously amped up), remembering to record the final moments, and remembering to watch my cues for my "readiness."  He's great.  After a little crying from the intensity, I said, "ok."  "It's a girl."  Shocked!  In fact, I thought I may not have reacted well because my head was so cloudy, and I thought she was a boy through most of my pregnancy...so did I look like I heard him wrong? haha.  Everyone thought it was a boy...except for the kids.  I got to watch that video back though, and I smiled....without confusion, haha.  She's a surpriser that Adelyn...just like her sister.  They laid her on me, and I said the same thing I did with Lydia.  "She's so tiny."  I really thought she was smaller than Lydia.  Nope, 8lbs.  Just a half inch shorter at 21 inches.  I had a rough evening as I was stitched up and smushed and poked.  We still had to decide her name.  Matt called my parents on speaker phone, and Lydia asked about her sister Adelyn.  Ha!  (We had talked about name possibilities with the kids, but Lydia usually just called the baby whatever she felt like at the moment.)  That sealed the deal I think, and I let Matt make the final decision.  Adelyn Grace it is.  "Beautiful.  Noble and bright."

She's perfect. She's the perfect addition to our 2 other perfectly beautiful babies.  We do make cute ones.  After she was born, I cried to Matt and said, "I can't do this again.  I'm done."  I may not have the prettiest birth story.  It may have been a bit traumatic.  But let me tell you, she's totally stolen my heart (as each of our kids has), and reminds me over and over how worth it she is.  Must be the Grace part of her name. :)  She's the best part.  It's over, and I have her.  She's such a gift.  A much longed for and prayed for gift.  I'm totally in love.

Dear Baby,

Am I really writing that?  Dear Baby?  Your due date is in just over a week, and what a whirlwind this pregnancy has been.

First of all, I love you.  We are all so anxious to meet you.

I found out you were on your way at the end of May.  I was completely shocked.  What a surprise!  I laughed, and I cried.  I just couldn't believe it.  After 2 years of hoping, you were finally on your way.  Your Dad was leaving for Germany at the end of the week, and I wanted to think of a great way to share with him.  I took your brother and sister to Walmart, shared the news with them, and had them pick something out for you.  Lydia picked a little bear with a blue blanket.  They didn't really get it that day, but I couldn't stop smiling.  I didn't tell anyone else all day.  You were my secret to hold onto.  I just kept asking God, "Really?"  I have life in me.  I have you.  I couldn't stop smiling or tearing up.  I was soaking in every precious moment.  It was so hard not to tell Dad, but I wanted to wait for Wednesday.  I had him help me fold the laundry, and in the laundry were big brother and sister shirts, a baby outfit for you, and your little bear.  Oh yeah, and a "pregnant" digital test....just so he would believe me.  Talk about a shock!  He cried.  Yup, your dad cried.  I've got most of it on tape.

You are a miracle.  You are dearly loved.  Your brother and sister adore you.  Stevie asks every day when you're coming.  Lydia drapes herself across my belly, lavishly gifting you with hugs and kisses, telling me every time how much she loves you.  She loves to see you move.  Stevie brings a ball over for you to kick, or he just thinks your burping.  He gives you little pats and will rest his hand on you to feel your strong kicks.  The big booming voice you hear is your dad's.  He says goodbye to you every morning before he leaves for work.

We cannot wait to meet you.  Are you my little boy or my little girl?  Will you look like your brother or your sister?  It almost seems as if I've been holding my breath the last 9 months.  It's still hard to believe you're here, but you are already such a gift.  I cannot wait to exhale as soon as I see your sweet face.  Your Grandma says I've never laughed so much as I have since carrying you.  I'm so thankful for you.  I wish I could express to you the joy you bring to me...to us... already.  I pray I'm a mom who can show you that joy and show you how much I love you for the rest of my life.  Gear up for this crazy family, little one.  We're all waiting with our party hats on!

Love always ...just waiting for the kiss,
Mom

#5

My Dear Stevie,

Today you turned 5 years old.  I can't believe you're 5 years old already.  It seems like you were just a 2 year old yesterday.  I remember watching kindergarten children getting on and off the bus when you were a few months old and realizing it was going to come all too quickly... and it has.  You're going to be starting Kindergarten this fall!  I'm so thankful that we'll be doing to it together, and I'm very excited to be part of that new adventure with you.  I'm sure we're going to learn a whole lot more about trains. :)

This year you went to Preschool, and Ms. Sue was your teacher.  You loved school so much!  Almost every class day, I would make it a point to get to school early to pick you up....just so I could catch a glimpse of how much fun you were having on the playground or in the gym with your friends.  Of course the best day for me was the day you were ok with me coming to your class.  You showed me everything and loved having me (and Daddy on his day...your 1/2 birthday day with donuts) as your guest.  Whenever there was a party at school, and you came home with a goodie bag, you'd give Lydia a treat from it first.  You are that kind of brother....that kind of awesome boy!  You always picked something pretty small for show and tell...usually matchbox cars of some kind, or trains, or planes, or helicopters.  I'm sure 95% of the time you mentioned, "Mommy got it at a garage sale."   At Graduation, you were so proud, and we couldn't have been more proud of you.  You even chose to wear a tie ...putting it on yourself....because it was such a big deal.  The huge smiles, waves, and thumbs up you sent our way just added icing to the cake.  This was such a good year for you, and a part of me wishes it could've lasted forever, but I'm sure you'd like to keep getting bigger...just like Daddy, you say.

You still love to ride your bike, swing on the swings in the backyard, hit the wiffle ball high and far with your bat, and play basketball (and Dude Perfect).  You now like me to defend you as we play one on one games.  That's pretty cool...and if my arms aren't up or out, you let me know, and you tell me to "scoot, Mom."  You make the score up as we go and announce, "3 to 5."  You made your "Home Shot" which was pretty exciting for us all.  You can make some pretty sweet shots!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-jU7st9jIWQ

Now you've started soccer.  You wanted to play, but you weren't so sure about it the first few practices and games with so many kids on the field and the loud whistle, but God made you a strong boy who is brave and tries his best...even if we need reminders to get up and keep going.  You are playing now and you really enjoy it!!  The number 5 cool blue jersey helps too!  You are so proud when you make contact with the ball, and we love to catch that smile.  Keep it up, buddy!  You are so courageous.  We've been praying for that...and God is answering.  It's not always easy to have courage, but you can do ALL things with His strength.  You went down the SUPER fast, adult water slides when we went to a hotel water park last month.  I couldn't believe it!!  All of a sudden, I saw you at the end of one slide and Daddy on the other.  All by yourself!  And, you had fun!  Look at the things you can do when you try!  You still like your typical favorite foods and meals (chicken nuggets, hot dogs, chocolate chip cookies, ice cream, and chocolate in general), but you are eating so much healthier now overall and you are willing to try so many new things and have found them to not be so bad after all. 

You are a wonderful brother to Lydia.  You aim to protect her from danger and you are best buddies.  You get into mischief together sometimes, and you wrestle sometimes....and sometimes you are so loud together people wonder how many kids we have in the house.  You pretend to do all sorts of things together, riding trains and buses, taking a sick baby to the hospital.  You often let her sleep in your bed even though "she has too many friends" she brings up with her.  You are so caring and sharing, and if she's ever crying or hurt, you try to make her feel better.  You're also her translator...though she rarely needs one, but you want to make sure I know what she needs or wants.  If she makes a mess, I hear about it from you, "Ohhh, Lydia Matthew!!" 

You still love all trains (steam trains are your favorite) and any kind of vehicle or mode of transportation.  Some of your construction trucks made appearances in our Nativity scene last Christmas.  You were a fantastic shepherd in the Live Nativity this year...blowing us away, as if it was "your thing."  Over and over again, the Lord provides exactly what you'd like for gifts.  For Christmas, you got your special train Lincoln Log set, and for your birthday, you got a motorized engine for your wooden tracks and you got the Thomas carrying big that unzips to a play mat.  You like those hard to find items, and God brings them in.  Knowing how much I love you, and seeing acts of special love and touches on your life by our God brings me closer to Him.  You are so precious to Him, and you're so precious to us.  God is already using you in my life, in Daddy's life, and in others' lives for greatness.  You praise the Lord whenever a lost toy is found, whenever the sun comes out (EVERY time), whenever something wonderful comes your way.  Your prayers are so rich and good.  You don't say a lot, but you ask for Daddy to get home safe each night, you ask God to touch your skin (boo-boos or eczema), you thank him for everyone in our family, and you ask him to help you obey.  What that does to your mom's heart....what that must do to God's heart.  You are like David in the Bible...seeking after God's heart.  When you obey Mommy and Daddy, it is not only good for your well-being, you are learning, growing, and practicing to obey Jesus.  Ohh the things He can do through you when you obey...and with that courage that is growing within you and your caring, compassionate heart!!  I get so excited just thinking about it!   

I love you so much, Stevie....and it's not because of what you've done or what you'll do.  I love you because you're you.  We're with you during the highs and we're with you in the lows.  No matter what, we'll keep cheering you on.  I know you've said it a couple times....that it's your best birthday ever.  I really hope you feel as loved as you are.  5 years old!!  Happy Birthday, Steves!

With love and a kiss, always and forever, through the sunshine and the rain,
Mom

3 Years Old

My Precious Lydia,

Today, you turned 3 years old.  Where do I even begin with the stories you leave me to remember and share?  This past year you (and your brother) have kept me so incredibly busy and one day, I am determined to be one step ahead of you.

For starters, I want to let you know that I love you SO much.  You add so much joy, adventure, and life to our days.  You make us all laugh....and your laugh is completely contagious.  You are strong, and you still love to climb, jump, and tumble up/off most anything.  You love gymnastics, and I love that special time I get to share with you there.  It's pretty much a perfect fit for you now....you love it all....and to top it off, you love to wear your leotards.  On your first day, you showed off your beautiful forward roll complete with the Ta-Da stance at the beginning and the end.  When you stumbled and fell out of your cartwheel, you sighed and shouted, "Got it!  Got it!" making your coach laugh out loud.  You are also caring ...especially when others are hurt and sick....and you're always ready with a hug.  When I had a migraine, you tenderly asked me if I bumped my head and needed a bandaid.  You love to help me put away laundry and sweep.  Sometimes you start the washing machine (for a 2nd time or when it's empty) without my knowledge.  Your bunny is still your most cherished possession, and he goes almost everywhere with you.  You love to dress up....skirts, princess clothes, heels, jewelry, and hats.  You also love balls.  The only things you asked for for your birthday was a ball and fruit snacks.  There is not one food either your Dad or I can think of that you don't eat.  Not one!!  You eat everything and a lot of it.  You are always ready to try new things, whether it's food or an activity.  That makes things a little easier for me ....for the most part. :)  You love to sing, and I never get tired of hearing you...whether you're singing about what you're playing or real songs.  Your favorites are "When we all get to Heaven" and "Away in a Manger" (before the 2nd verse, you say, "How 'bout the cows?).  You love your brother so much.  You are best friends and partners in fun and mischief.  I hope you are always close.  I just know God made you the way you are to do some wonderful things...even amazing things..., and I have no doubt you will bless many lives.  You already do! 

I could write a book about your antics over the last year alone.  Some day, I may just write that book.  "Life with Lydia" or "While Mommy was in the Shower."  For now, here are some etched in my memory:

*You flipped up the seat on your big wheel (that exposes the storage compartment) and tried to use it as a potty seat out in the front yard.  There you were, sitting with a smile and no pants.  I caught you just in time to let you know that it was NOT a potty seat!

*You locked me in our storage room closet when I was organizing.  I definitely panicked because you couldn't get the door open again.  Big Brother saved the day!  I now have to keep a phone with me when I go in.

*You and Stevie ate almost an entire bag of Hershey kisses at Christmas time (while I was in the shower)....among other goodies on what seemed like almost a daily basis.  Even with chocolate covered faces you told me that somebody "taked all your trocoloate."

*You were offended that an excavator would not "scooch" over for us while we were driving in a construction area.

*You finished off my box of sour patch kids I had in my purse.  With an awful look on your face, you were convinced you liked them and powered through.  You still love to dig out "grump" (gum) from my purse.

*You were calling glitter "gidders" and now it's "glivvers."  I love both versions.

*You asked Bunny if he'd like to go to Sky Zone...and then you started to jump on an over-turned baby gate.  Only Bunny can go to that Sky Zone, Lydia.

*Your first imaginary friend was Buzz-Saw Louie (or "Loulee" as you called him)

*You tried to eat out of a yogurt container with a spatula.  One of many utensils you've utilized creatively.

*Sleep is not your favorite activity...because you're not able to be active.  I often find you out of your bed providing a picnic lunch for Stevie's dinosaurs or modeling inside out Thomas the Train swim trunks and shoes over your jammies in the late hours of the evening.

*You always want the biggest of anything....the biggest snacks/desserts, the biggest rides, the tallest balance beam, the highest bouncy slide, the tallest mats to jump off of.  Go big or go home....that's you.

*You call Grandpa daily on the real phone and your play phones.  "Well hello, Grandpa."

*You used your Christmas present ironing board as a boat since day one.  You still aren't sure how to use it the right way.

*You wished people a Merry Christmas long after Christmas was over whenever we said goodbye.  When guests leave our house, you're quick to say, "Fank you for coming!"

*You tell me almost daily (when you barge in) that I'm too big to use our toilet.  You still have not come up with a suitable solution for me. 

*Usually when my hair is wet from my shower, you run your fingers through it.  Even though it messes it all up, I love your affection....even if you sometimes say you're petting me.

*Sometimes you sneak upstairs and change into a skirt instead of your pants.  Sometimes, your skirt is really a short sleeve shirt you're wearing on your hips....the neck hole around your waist. 

*Daddy brought home a co-worker from Germany for dinner for the first time.  You happily sat next to him telling him all about how you have to keep your underwear dry.  You also initiated a snowball fight with him.

*You threw a jump rope down the stairs yelling, "I pink it's a snake, Steebie!"  Thankfully, it was just a jump rope, but I came running!

*You've been known to streak through the house in only your cowgirl boots...and those are often on the wrong feet. 

*You tried the oven mitt on as a slipper.

*You talk and talk to me in the van (if you're not singing), and one day you were going on and on about the garbage truck in front of us, telling me the noises it makes, how it works.  You ended your verbalized thoughts with, "And it'd be so fun to drive, right Mom?"  Then you moved onto whatever else was on your mind.

*Some day, ask me what you meant by "Ladybugs crashed into my belly."  I'll share the anatomy lesson you gave me.  You love ladybugs.  You're also scared of them.  You wanted ladybug decorations and cupcakes for your birthday.

*When we were out to dinner, you pointed out another couple asking me if I "see the Cosbys, Mom?" One of your baby dolls has been affectionately named, "Little Bill."

*We only have a shower, so we sometimes fill a large Rubbermaid bin for you to splash around in like a bathtub.  We went down the storage aisle at Walmart, and you shouted, "Look at all the bathtubs, Mom!"  You wanted to get a purple one.

*Whenever you don't know what something's called you ALWAYS say, "Oh, you've got ....those Mom?"

*I got you a pair of brown sandals.  You asked if they were Jesus'.

*You often start and end your questions with Mom ...Mom?

*Our home phone....for months....was often out of battery because you would put your own Minnie Mouse or Princess phone on the charger instead of our real one.

*You have a sparkly, glittery baton you use as a pointer like Grandma does in Sunday School.  You've named it your "Blessed are they."  You've also whipped around in front of Stevie asking him if he wants to fight.  We prefer you to use it as your "Blessed are they..."

*You love to rub noses with me or Daddy...but especially Daddy.  Whenever he calls your name, you almost always tell him you love him.

*It's always special to find you sleeping in Stevie's bed next to him.

*Today you sang "Happy Birthday" to yourself...several times, but whenever anyone wished you a happy birthday, you wished it back to them.  You asked me frequently through the day, "Mom, is it my birthday?"  Yes, Lydia.  Then you'd give me a knowing smile...proudly soaking it all in.

We are so thankful for you!  We wish you the happiest of birthdays!

Love you always and forever,
Mom

Remembering

It's hard to imagine having a one year old toddling around our house today.  Stevie and Lydia are keeping the house noisy and busy, playing basketball.  Yes, we have the Little Tikes hoop inside.  So, I try to imagine a little guy in the mix chasing after a ball with the other two.

We would've been celebrating his first birthday today. 

Instead, he gets to celebrate today with Jesus.

Lydia sat next to me on the couch for a minute this morning and started singing her favorite song these days.  "When We All Get to Heaven." 

Have a special day, Zeph.  Mommy loves you. 

Disasters at the Doctor's

Two days ago, my sweet Stevie broke his finger.  We were told to follow up with his pediatrician two days later...today.  I tried setting the appointment yesterday, because I had errands to run today and people to meet up with and I just wanted to know what time we'd need to work around....blah, blah.  The Dr office wanted to only schedule "day of" appointments.  I called back today...and waited an hour for a call back from them, saying he needed to be seen by an Orthopedic Dr.  I called that Dr, and they had one opening 20 minutes from that time.  I couldn't make it to that office in 20 minutes if I had my own jet pack, but what are you gonna do?  So, I said I'd do my best.  We took our bathroom trips and loaded up.  I am frantically trying to punch the address to this new office into our gps.  It won't work.  Doesn't recognize the street name.  Ughhh.  I ran back inside to look it up online....to find that the Point in the road had an "e" at the end.  That would've been helpful information.  I can't print from my laptop because one child has disabled something on it...so it refuses to print. I put the new "Pointe" into my gps, and off we go.  Never mind that sometimes it thinks I'm on a completely different road than I actually am and needs to readjust every couple of minutes.  That makes traveling...while in a hurry with little ones...especially fun.  Stressed?  Psshh!

We made it there a little late, mmhmm, and rushed in (as much as a 4 and 2 1/2 year old like to "rush"...swimming in a pool of peanut butter...amen?).  We checked in, and I'm handed the huge stack of paper work since we're new.  The kids were being sooo good.  Like, really good!!  They are good kids in general, but boy, I was noticing.  It went much more smoothly than our Urgent Care visit 2 nights before.  ("Please stop jumping off that!" "We've had enough injuries for one night,"  "Take that out of your mouth," "PLEASE get out of there," "I know that looks cool, but do you know where that's been?")  We got called back quickly (whoa!)...did the whole height, weight, etc. with the nurse, and his name was even Stephen.  The nurse left us to wait for the Doctor.  Oh, this visit is going so well, I was thinking...even if we were a little late, and I was a little stressed.

I set the kids up with some "occupiers" together on the table and tried to complete the three hundred pages of health history and the levels of pain my son's been in.  Ha, I thought it was hard for myself to give a number from 0-10!  Stevie said 3!  Sounded good to him.  While I worked, I noticed one of my children "wiggle and dance."  All moms know what that means.  "Do you need to go potty?"  "No."  The dancing gets worse.  "Do you need to go potty?"  A panicked "yes" comes in response this time...and then "Oh no, I'm wet!" and I scoop child up and run to the hall.  Where is child number 2?  Still happily sitting on the exam table.  Scoop that child up, one under each arm....more than 70 lbs of children here!  We tried to run (umm, ha), but I quickly realized I didn't know where to go.  Newbies.  The nurse saw us stumbling around in the hallway, and led the way.  We get in, and I'm relieved that in fact we made it in time as I helped my child use the bathroom.  We made it!  (Cheers in my head)

But, I thought too soon...and that child also was relieved. The flood gates opened before we were quite ready (what did you drink this morning?), which resulted in my entire right pant leg from mid-thigh down becoming saturated, a little on child's pants (go figure), and the pacific ocean covering the floor of the entire handicap stall.  As I try to calm wet child down...and get cleaned up, my other child is pointing out the big mess, and saying, "Mommy, you got all wet?"  I had one in tears over wet pants and one marveling over the ginormous puddle...just itching for a boat and a swim.  I'm trying to think how I can quickly clean this up before A.) the Dr. comes to our room  B.) the dry child becomes wet child  C.) the wet child has an even bigger melt down  D.) the pacific ocean consumes neighboring dry lands  E.) anyone else comes in and stumbles upon our creation!  Talk about pressure!  I did my best cleaning up and clothing the child who was wet, and I did my best with the pacific ocean (sorry about the trash can, but hey, that's better than the floor! and THANK YOU for having paper towels...and not just a dryer), and my happy, enamored child gave me a break and stayed clear.  (Say, what?)  It was time to clean myself up.  What do I do with urine soaked pants?  Seriously, this was not just a dab....this was water war soaked.  I got out the paper towels, soap, and water, and did a little scrubbing...and then I laughed....and laughed...and wished there was a dryer after all.  All I could think of was the scene in Army Wives when Roxy is trying to get the wine out of her dress in the bathroom, and she's scrubbing at the sink saying to all those around, "No need for tears, ladies.  Got it at the Goodwill."  (You have to know the show....and the fact that almost all my clothes are thrift store or garage sale.)  No one walked in on us....phew!  But, I'm sure they were wondering what in the world we were doing in the bathroom so long.

We tried to "quickly" make it back to our room, smiling at everyone in the hall as we passed (me and child who watched, child who participated was not so happy).  What a sight we must've been.  Frazzled and soaked and no doubt stringing along a piece of toilet paper stuck to the bottom of each of our shoes.  We can laugh or cry...and I decided to laugh, but poor child was not dealing as well as Mommy with wet pants.  I had a second pair in the van...but how does one tow both kids out to the parking lot of a big office, get changed, and make it back in time for the doctor??  And...we were already late.  For real, the ONE time I don't bring the whole backpacking gear with us, is the one time we need it.  So, the Dr. entered, and we explained, and she said, "We have shorts!  Would you like a pair?"  The child did.  I politely declined for myself.  The shorts said "Peds" on them, but they looked like XXL men's boxer shorts....paper boxers, haha... disposable boxers.  Child was happy though, and I was happy.  And very wet....and a bit smelly.  We made it through the visit, and Stevie was a champ for all the prodding on his finger.  Then we proudly made our way out the doors, parade style as always with young children, and through the waiting room with soggy clothes and one adorable little one in some super large, breezy shorts.  The child liked them so much, that instead of doing a quick change, they requested to wear them home with a blanket on their lap.  No sticker or toy this visit, but one of them got a pretty cool pair of paper balloon shorts!  

It's a bummer that office won't have the pleasure of us visiting again any time soon.